that I'm lazy
that I am not motivated
that I procrastinate alot
that I lack the drive to do anything
but why? why am I like this? what could be the cause?
I wonder..
I used to tell myself its because I do not know what I want to in life, that theres nothing worth striving for.
Now I know why.
Its not because I dont know what I want in life.
I do know what I want, I want lots of things. Dreams, materialistic dreams, rockstar dreams, dreams of hawaii, to score really well for exams, to make my mum happy, to be a better person, lots of money, fasts cars..
Why?
Its because I'm too afraid to fail. Im afraid that if I work hard for something, it might not turn out to be what I want in the future. I spend all my time worrying and wondering instead of being FOCUSED on HERE&NOW.
Thats why.